Got this feeling again
This empty feeling...

Wondering what do one really want in life?
The decisions that one have to make and made,
What's the right choice ?
What's the wrong choice ?
We are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss..

I need some motivation & morale boosting !!

Got 2 awards ...
Getting 150bucks more for my SSS ownage...
Got Confirmed as NSI...
PAY Increase...
ORDing Soon...

Internal Service Award
Commander's Commendation
The 2 Awards i receiving and received.
Thanks to doing events in APD
But nothing from my boss T.T
Sometimes i wonder.. Maybe one day he will "liang xin fa xian"
when the next NSPI take over..

Confirmed as Police Inspector, no more probationary !! woo hoo..
Pay Increasing to 1200 !!!
+ 150(from SSS) = 1350 !!! March 12 !!!
Getting paid 6 bucks an hr for NS...

Want a 32"inch TV so bad !! Hope I can win the lucky draw at APD DnD !!

Friendship... I cherish !! =D
Miss Lim Jin Hui... I cherish !! =D
Family... I cherish !! =D

haix...
sianx...
AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....

argggggggg

haix...
sianx...
AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....

argggggggg

Life is full of crap..

Crap shit..
Crap people..
Crap stuff..
Crap things..

funny thing..

anyway... clear my ippt and shooting...
no more P in my NSPI..

I am inspector lo !!

Isn't it all the same ?

Life that is ?

Whats next ?

Time is of the essence...

A new year !! A new beginning !! A new direction !!

life is not measured by mins, but by moments !!

I downloaded a movie before new year,

The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons.

I watched it 2nd January 2009
Its the best movies I've watched...
Leaving myself without words to describe
I'll remember this movie

A quote from the movie

You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went
You can swear and curse fates
but when it comes to the end
You have to let go

A tagline form the movie

Life isn't measured in minutes, but in moments

Best movie ever...
I'll watch it again and again...
Watch it again and again as i grow old..
Watch it again and again....

What was 2008 for you ?
What happened in 2008 ?
Are you happier ?
What did you do ?
What would 2009 be for you ?

2008,
I went bangkok with my lovely miss lim jin hui
I POPed from Tracom as National Service Probationary Inspector
I refurnished my room
I fixed up my every own desktop
I ermmx.. started ACCA and decided myself i didnt want to continue this path
I went to Airport to become STAFF OFFICER HEAD OPERATIONS & TRAINING A.K.A SO HOT
I performed well and up to standard in my workplace
I went Outward bound while training in Tracom..
I became slightly more anti-social...
I organized events at Airport police... and it's the best they've ever had !! :b

2009

I shall start driving
I shall start running
I shall start dreaming
I shall spend a lot of time with my friends
I want to have 80% hardship in my life, 20% taste of happiness would be enough !!
Lastly, It'll be fun to go overseas !! :b

Ahhhhhhhhh.......

What if...

HHO HO0 HO Meerrrry Christmas !!

and a happy new year !!

gal gal... miss ya !!

exercise !!
work !!
interaction !!
take care of gal gal !!
event for APD !!
ikea with ze kai & friends !!

oki !! these items at the moment!!

my poor gal gal is sick !!

get well soon k !! get well soon k !!

a joke to share !!

　　小明的老师规定要日行一善，每天要报告，
　　一天，小明和小美的报告都是扶老婆婆过马路，
　　在老师详细追问下，
　　小明说：「是我扶老婆婆的！」
　　小美接着说：「我帮小明的忙！」
　　老师问：「扶一个老婆婆为何要两个人？」
　　两人回答：
　　「因为老婆婆很固执不肯过马路，而且她力气又很大...」

get well soon k gal gal

Tomorrow

What do you expect of your tomorrow ?

Work... get back home, look for things to do, play game , watch videos, slack ?

Arggg !!! F[_](l< !! Its cursing and swearingly dumb pathetic and disgusting.

Everyday, every free time you have, assuming that your work is just a job, nothing exciting just a commitment you have to give to your nation.

Is there any other thing keeping you alive, your life exciting, your life to be look forwarded to tomorrow ?

Entertainment ? I've conquered all sorts of crap entertainments ... Game consoles, MMORPG, PC games, Videos, movies, Tv Shows. Megaupload lets me burn a latest xbox360 or PC game in less than 2 hours. 8gb in 2hrs. 1 WHOLE series of "YOU NAME IT" Drama can be downloaded within 30mis.

During secondary school, I've Had track and field. Training, training, train like a dog, train till dark. Its tiring, but it was really really fun and keep me feeling my life isn't a waste. Thanks to my track team, esp ppl like yuan zhi, ze kai and also people like norman, adam, qin xiang, blab blab blab that added so much so much fun into it. The experience of having a bunch of friends who wants nothing but to work hard and improve is like none other.
My classmates played a major role from then till now too.

During Poly, I've had Student Unions. Planning, Working. Experience working with different people, creating, exploring, successfully had events that was launched. It wasn't easy, but the rewards of having no regrets in an event. Sweet and special. Having a team, or a small group of people working for success is also really special. Special thanks to the committee members that really entertained me. special Thanks to Jean yeo jia yi for JAM and HOp and all the stuff a capable and giving president.
The other event was Sports Fiesta. Special thanks to ho yiting, lam wei siong, Clement , YONG SIANg , ying shya who played a huge part in entertaining and inspiring me and forcing me to vomit blood to complete the event.

After poly, I spend my days with this wonderful girl called miss lim jin hui. we went Genting, Bangkok, Redang and so many other special memories we share. We bake cookies together, cook dinner for my family, do all sorts of crap stuff together... this week she's off to genting with her family and haix, i'm alr missing her.

Present... National service ? I revamped my room with IKEA, made my own desktop, got new bag, became a NSPI, POLICE INSpector which does OTOT work hard with no satisfaction cause the scope is not of value.

But all these are short term targets, I dont want to go home each day and find myself having no dreams... I'm left with 6 more months of National service.

I HATE passing each day without tiring myself out,
without a reason to work hard,
without having hopes and goals for the day.
without a drive

Being deprived of all these really makes life empty and a torment.

Happiness

What is happiness ?
Do we even know what makes us happy?

Having a nicer room, a new made desktop or any more wants doesn't make one happier.

I believed it was the process, the time spend with her making my new room that made it so fun and special.
'We don't realize how quickly we will adapt to a pleasurable event and make it the backdrop of our lives. When any event occurs to us, we make it ordinary. And through becoming ordinary, we lose our happiness we gain from it.''

This theory is correct yet true happiness i think is always there, when one is struggling with life. The struggling the putting up of a fight. Having a reason to work hard for. Being able to do that is happiness.


I want to find my new pursuit of happiness.
my new reason to work hard.
my new hopes and goals.
my new drive.

Have u found yours ?

This part of your life is over ? the part now and the part of the past.

Have you found the next part ?

your pursuit of happiness ?

PLease take 3 mins to listen to the first song i uploaded... !! its really cool !!

Whats your dream ?

what are you going to work hard for when you grow up ?

zzzZzz...

time to start working hard...

working with idiots is tough.
Stood up to my boss.
clarified the situation with him.

let's face it.
Ops & Trg branch is a challenge.
As have my Ops Officer security(ASP) said,
"Being in ops is no easy feat and you will be moulded into someone of better calibre if you can survive this stint."

I've survived the busiest periods working from 7am-11pm(deployment), continous OT for weeks, having classes after work, innocently became scapgoat. Maybe there will be worse scenario...

At least, I've yet to disappoint my boss or other officers' expectation of my work and undermining my capabilities. But Airport Police Ops & Trg Branch does deliver some rare and precious values and rewards. A office of my own, its a real deal/ownage for a NSF. Exclusive experiences at airport transit, expensive goodie bags from events worth $100s.

I should consider myself lucky.

Luck/fate has always been kind to me.

Being in a complete and somewhat financially-abled family.
Being able to have best friends that have lasted.
Being able to spend time with my gf jin hui.
Being able to Win toto
Being able to be healthy
Being able to have my own office
Being able to decorate my room with ikea stuff
Being able to be happier and luckier than most ppl
Being able to have everything I would ever need

zi zui... and appreciate and embrace life.

now, pray pray hard I can clear the exams for ACCA for this SEM
then there would be no restrains/pressure for a CAREFREE, HAPPY MEEeeeee

I juz wanna say ... I got the chioest desktop feel ever ... style is pretttty

fugging ccb knn etc etc etc regulars .. wtf

RESPONSIBILITY
PRIDE
GUTS
RESPECT

none of these mean anything ?

PUI PUI PUI pUI PUI...

Personal RESPONSIBILITY...
Integrity
hardwork
effort

haiz... all these values mean nothing in my branch...

suffer the pain
struggle in the shame
fight the dishonorable

I will not succumb to the cheap values that u hold...

I swear to whatever i believe in...
that I willl never turn into losers like u...